It was never my intention to go this long without naming you.
Your Father and I have had countless discussions on the matter. However, the names at the top of his list include, but are not limited to: Amos, Clyde, Abe and Cash... yes, as in money.
After much thought, I believe your name should be Bubba Junior Hudson. We will combine your first and middle names to create a modern twist on an old classic-- Bubior. Of course, those who are nearest and dearest will shorten that to just plain "Bub."
Perhaps the following will help to explain....
Your Daddy (or "Deddy" as you will be taught to say) refuses to change out of his dress socks when playing ball, working out, or just chillin' after a long day at the office.
And speaking of barefoot, that's how your Mother stays... barefoot and pregnant.
Your Mother has also been known to allow children to play in the mud for hours on end.