I'm only 28... can this really be happening already??? Yesterday, while chasing Lightning down for beating up another child with a light-saber, something snapped in my back. My entire backside immediately stiffened and pain ran like a cheetah up and down my spine. I seriously lost my breath for a moment. The rest of the evening I did nothing. At all. I laid in the floor and moaned, wishing I had one of those medical alert bracelets so I could holler, "Help, I was spanking my child and I can't get up!" Bert was out doing yard work. I sent several kids out to tell him Mommy was hurt and to come quick, but he either didn't believe them, or by the time they got outside, they forgot why they were out and decided to play instead. Hopefully the latter.
So, on this beautiful Sunday, I am at home with two helpers by my side. Her Highness and Thunder got Lightning and Hail dressed for church. Bert teaches a class, so he needed to go. I am so thankful for crocks, other wise the boys would have been shoeless. I got tickled watching the older two take care of the younger ones. Hail obeyed their commands much quicker than he ever does my own. Thunder would say, "Come here, Babe. (not a name he usually uses, but under the "in charge" circumstances, I guess he found it fitting.) We need to get your hair brushed." Hail immediately came across the room, smiling. If it had been me, on a regular Sunday, that child would have run all across the house squealing, "No hair-brush! No hair-brush!" They finally got out the door.
Thunder, after Bert was gone, asked for something in a cabinet that is "up high." I explained, again, the reason he was home and I was stuck on the couch, and that he would have to wait until Daddy got back to get that. His response, "Momma, it's OKAY. You can just crawl, really- really slowly and get it. You don't even have to stand up!" All while demonstrating just how to crawl slowly without standing up. He even held one hand on his lower back. He finally gave up.
Later, Her Highness and Thunder brought me a delicious breakfast: a pack of pop-tarts and a box of Nilla Waffers. "Do you want a Capri-Sun too, Momma?" Having enough sugar in my lap, I dismissed them to go play. "I'll holler if I need anything else." While I was flipping back and forth between the local Baptist Church's Sunday televised service and Varsity Blues, Her Highness, who was still in her pajamas, came back to the living room.
"Hey, Momma. We're going to play House. Look at all our babies. We've got five! Just like you and Daddy."
Me: "Oh, that's sweet, Honey. How fun."
Her: "Yeah, and since I'm the Mommy, I need a skirt."
Me, not surprised because she refuses to wear pants and shorts most of the time, so all her play clothes are dresses or skorts: "Well, your clothes are in your dresser, Sweetie."
Her: "No, I want a Mommy skirt! Like a long skirt to be a grown-up. And do Mommy stuff in."
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS SHE TALKING ABOUT???? I live in jeans/sweats/t-shirts. What Mommy is she looking up to?? Sigh.
Me: "Sorry, I don't own any Mommy skirts, I guess. You could just play in one of your own and pretend."
Her: "That's fine. Mine are all prettier anyway."
I tuned back into Varsity Blues. Why is nothing decent on the Sunday lineup? And, why in the world can cast agencies not just come to the south if they want actors with southern accents?? Does anyone really talk like that? Gag.
Hope your Sunday is more enjoyable than mine. Bert should be back soon with Lightning and Hail and a heating pad. Ahhh.